Marnie:
The days that passed held some of the most painful feelings I've ever felt.
The heartrending songs that my ex-boyfriend sung through the tape were not only gorgeous, but they brought back too many memories.
It's been nearly a week.
Eight songs down. I have no idea how many to go.
Tomorrow was the fresh start of my very own mini-promotional-tour, an MPT. (That's what they call it.)
I'd got everything planned, but the only thing was, most of the songs I was going to perform, were about my relationship with Nick. The songs were inspired by him and his family and the experiences I've had with them.
But I guess they could be interpreted in any way they wanted to be. Most of them were pretty general.
Every time I'd turn on the TV flashes of images of the brothers would switch on. My eyes would well up instantly.
I loved them all.
Of course, Nick and I shared something that I cannot describe in words, the feelings that I felt towards him were too extreme to speak out about.
Apart from in my songs. It was just so easy, just came flowing instantaneously out of my mouth and music was made.
I sat down on my bed, reached for the play button on the cassette player and listened.
'This song, was when we first realised we were truly made for each other.'
I sucked in a breath. The chords began, and I drifted back to the scene when we made our true love vows.
'I hold you close,
You hold me tight,
This is for real,
The feelings right,
I've never spoken,
These words before,
Promise me baby,
You'll open the door,
I love you,
It's true,
I can't hide it anymore,
I love you,
I love the way you smile,
I love how you stuck around for a while,
I love it when you call my name,
Please tell baby,
That you feel the same,
You let me go,
I pull you back,
You're gravitational,
It's a fact,
I've never spoken,
These words before,
Promise me baby,
You'll open the door,
I love you,
It's true,
I can't hide it anymore,
I love you,
I love the way you smile,
I love how you stuck around for a while,
I love it when you call my name,
Please tell me baby,
That you feel the same...
I feel like we have something more,
Than a kiss, yeah,
I feel like we should set the score,
Like this,
I love you,
It's true,
I can't hide it anymore,
I love you,
I love the way you smile,
I love how you stuck around for a while,
I love it when you call my name,
Please tell me baby,
Tell me baby,
You feel the same.'
For the first time, I didn't cry at one of the songs.
I felt happy, because I remembered the feelings I had for him on that day.
Sure, I guess I'll never be able to experience them again, and I won't feel the warmth of his body ever again... nor will I know what it feels like to feel that loved.
But I had something else now.
Music.
I took the songs as inspiration, they helped me to define my sound, and create emotion in my songs, and no matter what comes my way now, I'll have the passion and drive to get me through it.
I'm done with crying.
And although, I'll always love Nick.
No matter what he's done to me.
He'll always be special to me, and I can never forget that.
Nor can I forget his amazing family, whom without I could have never rebuilt my life the way I have.
_________________________________________________________________________
Sunrise was truly the most beautiful natural thing I've ever seen.
Apart from Nick of course.
I'd come out onto the ocean front wearing one of Nick's navy hoodies and my denim shorts. I didn't have time to search for shoes, I was afraid I'd miss the view.
As I watched the sun streaks dance across the gentle waves I felt two arms wrap themselves around the front of my chest.
There was no question to who it was.
"Hey rockstar." I leant my head up and kissed his soft cheek.
He snuggled his head into the crook of my neck and kissed me tenderly.
I tingled, as usual.
"Why are you out here all on your lonesome hey?
"I wanted to see the sunrise."
I said simply, watching the horizon.
"Why didn't you come and get me?"
He asked, he didn't sound offended, just a little sad.
"Well, I didn't want to wake you. You looked so peaceful. And anyways, you don't care about nature anyways! You hate going anywhere near the wilderness!"
I felt his smirk stretching across his face.
"True." He stated.
"But I'd of loved to of spent it with you."
His voice sounded so seductive, but he was such a romantic.
"As you say Nicholas, it's just the sun. I mean it's not our source of life or anything like that."
He laughed softly.
"Shut it you."
He tickled my sides playfully, and I wriggled in his grip.
"I'll prove to you I'm not scared of nature!"
He released his arms around me and took of his t-shirt.
"Hey, big shot Jonas! I never said you were scared. Keep your pride Nick you needn't do anything to prove to me you're a real man!"
I laughed as I watched him strip down to his boxers.
"Erm, Nicholas. Now's not the time to be a wild child. I think I see the paps on their bikes over that sandy hill!"
I giggled.
"Let them see! I, Nick Jonas is not scared of nature!"
And with that, my proud boyfriend jumped right into the freezing cold ocean.
"Oh shit." I stated humorously as I watched his head pop up victoriously from the waves he had just created.
"Help me! I forgot, I can't swim!"
Oh no you don't Jonas.
"Please won't someone save me!?"
As he flailed around in the water, I couldn't help but laugh.
"You're ridiculous Jonas!" I squealed.
I took off the hoodie, and realised I was wearing a thin yellow vest-top.
What the hell.
I ran into the waves and jumped into the ocean as if it was my long lost friend.
I felt Nick's arms lift me in the water, and I wrapped my arms and legs around him and we floated there, embracing as we dipped up and down with the current.
"Do you know what?"
Nick hushed quietly.
"First of all Nick. No one else is around to hear us. And, what is it you crazy boy?"
"Ok then." He stated in a louder voice.
But nothing could of prepared me for what was coming next.
"MARNIE ELOISE JONAS! I LOVE YOU!"
He screamed at the top of his lungs, he made my whole body vibrate and tingle with excitement.
"Nick!" I half squealed-screeched.
"What?" He grinned that adorable open-mouthed grin and I melted.
My voice toned right down, it was tender soft, and what I was about to say I couldn't of meant more.
"I love you too."
We both smiled at each other, and I pressed myself forwards and we kissed.
Soft, tender, meaningful kisses that I would of exchanged the world for.
"Marnie."
Nick breathed out as our lips came apart from each other's.
"There's no one else I'd rather be with than you. You mean the world to me, you mean everything, and I'm so lucky to have you. There is no one else you compare to..."
I stared at him.
"I'd rather be with you."
My mouth crept into a big grin, my head fell onto his shoulder and I flicked my head back to look at this casanova right in the eye.
"You have no idea how much you mean to me, without you... I'd be nothing. I'd lose everything."
My forehead fell gently against his, tears starting to sting my eyes as the salty ocean water began to grow with strength.
"No Marnie. Without you, I'd be lost. I promise you baby, I'll never leave you, ever. You will always mean the world to me, no matter what."
I breathed out in awe.
"No matter what?"
"No matter what."
He replied simply, and kissed my hairline.
"Come on you little water baby, I think it's time we got out of here."
I giggled and he kissed my cheek.
He carried me out of the water and dropped me down onto the sand carefully when we reached the water's edge.
We were soaking wet, no surprise really, what did I expect after being in the ocean?
He picked up his clothes and dried himself quickly, he was still dripping.
He then picked up his hoodie that I'd thrown onto the sand and wrapped it around me.
"Why do you insist on wearing my clothes? I'm not saying you don't look good, because well you always look good but... they are always miles too big for you!"
I looked down at his attire on my body.
"I don't care. And anyways they're most comfortable."
I said beaming up playfully at him.
"Oh really? Comfortable you say?"
He smiled at me.
All of a sudden he picked me up with such force I let out a small stifled scream and held underneath the tops of my thighs and pecked my chin as I was above his level for once.
He proceeded to tickle me all the way back up to our apartment. I couldn't do anything, I was trapped in the arms of a Jonas.
A Jonas in a Jonas, who'd of thought it?
Hey, none of your innuendos' ok?
Joe watched us stumble in as Nick threw me onto the sofa.
"Where have you two rascals been then?"
He said in a sing-song voice.
"Nowhere. Just to the moon and back."
Nick's smile gleamed over on me, and it really was out of this world.
Joe ruffled my damp hair.
"Hmm, if I didn't know any better I'd say you'd been swimming."
Joe bantered.
"Well, swimming isn't really the word."
Nick laughed.
"Yeah, Nick can't really swim can he?"
Joe chuckled.
"Wait, Nick. You really can't swim?"
I smiled, and I knew his and his brother's grin meant torture for me.
I was suddenly attacked by two Jonas' and I was unable to stop my self from laughing.
Frankie wandered in from his bedroom.
"Frankie. Back off!" I half-yelled at him as he came closer.
"This is too good to pass, the million times you get me!"
Frankie lunged forward and joined his brothers.
This went on for about... ten minutes?
We all ended up on a laughing heap on the floor.
Joe got a hold of Frankie's hand and they went into the kitchen for some breakfast.
Nick rolled over so we were facing each other.
"I'm so glad you're in this family. We all love you, you know."
Nick placed a small kiss on the end of my nose.
"I love them all too."
I smiled.
He stroked my hair.
"Want some breakfast?" He questioned me.
"I'm so glad you asked! I'm starving!"
We giggled and went to eat the most satisfying breakfast I'd had in a long time.
_________________________________________________________________________
The audience loved my set.
They love the songs.
And, oddly, and weirdly enough. I think they may love me?
Not only girls were in the crowd but guys too, which I appreciated alot because most of my stuff is real gushy and heartfelt.
But hey, I can't complain!
It was a wondrous night, simply the best time I'm had in so long.
"Marnie! You rocked it chick!"
Demi came along to see my first show.
Yes, the Demi Lovato.
She pulled me into a hug.
"Thanks Dem!" I smiled at her.
"So, how're you doing?"
"Oh I'm fine, and this show has certainly set me straight again."
"Good for you girl. Hey, wanna come to my party tonight, it's in about an hour, but you look gorgeous anyway! Meet you here?"
She handed me a slip of paper.
"Sure." I grinned.
Life was just getting better and better, like I said, sewing itself together again so fast, I must be better at knitting than I thought!
I got in my bus, and instructed Dave (my driver) to the location.
When I opened the door paparazzi cameras flashed rapidly into my eyes, I held my hand up and walked into the doors.
Everything looked so familiar, but I was sure I'd never been here before.
I spotted Demi.
"Hey, hey Miss Lovato, you look great!" I grinned and hugged her excitedly.
"Likewise babe." And she grinned her beautiful signature smile.
All of a sudden I felt I hard hit against my head.
And before I could take it the pain, I was on the floor.
I stared up, everything seemed to be spinning. My vision blurry and out of focus.
"What the hell did you do to Nick you nasty little bitch!"
I recognized that voice anywhere.
The southern twang, the gorgeous brown hair flowing from her head. The attire nowhere near suitable for someone her age.
Miley Fucking Cyrus.
_________________________________________________________________________
